Kindergarten

Kindergarten.

Who knew that a  5  almost 6 year old’s activities could cause such a tug of war on a Mama’s heart? I was mostly clueless. Maybe that explains my emotional state this past week? Sometimes it leaves me breathless, or with wet eyeballs, but also with a full heart. This is my tug of war.

Kindergarten; a time that you look forward to for so long, and then when the first day comes, it takes your breath away.

Kindergarten; a thing that you talk about, daily, getting your girl so excited for, and then your eyeballs get a little wet when you leave her there and drive away.

Kindergarten; a time when you are so proud as your child runs to the playground, almost forgetting to wave goodbye, but also so sad that they don’t hold on for a little longer.

Kindergarten; a time when someone else teaches and takes care of your kid, but also a time when you’re a little sad that someone else is teaching and taking care of your child.

Kindergarten; a time where you’re excited that your child has an opportunity, for the almost the first time in her life, to be Jesus to those around her who don’t know about Him, even the littlest ways; but also terrified that that is not what all her classmates are also hoping to be.

Kindergarten; a time when you pray more for your child then ever before…and then wonder how much you’re going to have to be on your knees when Middle School and High School roll around.

Kindergarten; a time when you get to see your child, with a bit of independence, with a chance to make choices without you there, and you realize that they are making choices that make you so proud and humble all at the same time.

Kindergarten; a time when you feel all the feels you didn’t even know you could feel and you realize your heart still hasn’t burst.

Kindergarten; a sad and happy time, all at the same time.

And we will make it.

 

Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

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Don’t Miss It.

A dear friend gifted me a mug a few months ago, and it has quickly become a favorite of mine. It reminds me daily that there are things that are going to happen that day that I won’t ever get back. So, don’t miss it!

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This morning I had a gut check moment as I thought about this. Emma has been getting in trouble for lying a lot lately. It breaks this Momma’s heart every time it happens. Usually its about things that don’t even matter, and it can quickly get frustrating.

I found myself just wishing it away. Get past this girl, come on!

But, also this morning, as I was looking at my sweet Emma girl’s face I realized one thing..this may be one of the only chances I have to nurture her heart in this area. Don’t miss it.

I may not have another chance to help her realize that this is a heart issue and the only way it will change is if God changes her heart. Don’t miss it.

I was nearly in tears as I realized, I can’t wish this away. I can’t hope that tomorrow I don’t have to deal with this.

Rather, my prayer should be: “Lord, let this continue until Emma realizes what it means for her heart to change. Give me the words to show her this. Please don’t allow her to stop until you have changed her heart and she realizes it; until you have a hold on her heart and you won’t ever let go.”

This is my new prayer. This is my whole purpose as a mom. Don’t miss it. 

I don’t want to wish this phase away…I want to embrace it until she has learned everything she possibly can from it.

Don’t miss it. You won’t ever get it back.

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Little Moments

Some days, as a mom, I feel like I fail my two sweet girls. I spend more time disciplining and overseeing them than I do being with them. I get busy with laundry, dishes, and cleaning bathrooms. I breathe a sigh of relief when it is nap time and bedtime. Often in the mornings, I say to myself, today will be different. And I try to make BIG changes. BIG changes aren’t lasting changes though. BIG changes are daunting. It is then that I reminded that all I need are little moments.

Each day, I need a “little moment” with each of my girls. It can be playing a game of Jenga will I’m cooking dinner; it can be sitting on the couch reading a book with one of them in my lap; it can be a tickle match on the floor; and it can even be singing songs with the littlest one while she is on the potty trying to make pee-pee come.

It does not have to be glamorous, or BIG. Once a day, make the little moment with your child the one that matters the most.

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And, I’ve found, that most of the time, it is the little moments that are the best moments. It is the ones at the end of the day that I look back on and love the most.

 

So, I encourage you, today, to take time for the little moments. Make them a priority. Put down your phone for 10 minutes and embrace the uninterrupted time with your kid.

It really is the best.

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Time

I saw this quote on Pinterest a few days ago and it really caught my attention…

I don’t want to look back on my life in twenty years and realize that I wasted the precious time I had with my children by living in a state of perpetual distraction,” – the Undivided Mom.

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Ouch. 

I only have these girls for a time. I only get to giggle with them, craft with them, hold them, read to them, teach them and raise them for a time.

These sweet hands, praying before dinner, are only going to be at my table for a time.

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I’m only going to be able to tickle this girl while she is in my arms for so long.
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In the moment, or in the day, it may seem long at times. But the years, they fly by. And what am I doing with that time I am given? Am I present? Am I involved?

Outside of my relationship with God and my relationship with my husband, being a mom to my two girls is my highest priority. It is my mission.

This isn’t always easy, and I by no means am perfect. But it is my goal. It is in the back of my mind each day.

How am I going to teach them about God’s perfect love, if I don’t take the time to love them every minute I have the chance. How am I going to teach them that they are so important to God, if they feel like they aren’t important enough to me to have my undivided attention each day?

This doesn’t mean that I can’t take time without them. It just means that when I am with them, I am present. I am there. And it means I am intentional about having time with them, more than planning time without them. It is not without sacrifice, but it also, is not without its rewards.

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Living Through the Mundane

Do you ever feel as though your life is full of mundane tasks? This is a daily struggle for me.

Diapers, dishes, naps, meals, cleaning, dropping off, picking up…preschool, swimming lessons, basketball, golf…all the things.

These things, these little seemingly mundane things are the things that make up most of my days.

For my devotions lately, I’ve been studying the book of Nehemiah. In chapter 3, there is a lengthy list of all of the people who built small sections of the wall around the city of Jerusalem. They each obeyed, and moved rock after rock in order to build this wall. It wasn’t beautiful or glamorous or anything of the sort. It was mundane.

Just think though, how great is a wall that has holes everywhere? Or even just one hole? A wall with holes won’t keep the enemy out. Had any of those people decided they couldn’t do the mundane, decided that they needed something glamorous, the entire wall would have been useless. Which over the course of history, could have changed the entire story for the city of Jerusalem. There are direct links between the wall built in Nehemiah and the Siloam Pool in John, where Jesus heals the blind man. This is also where Peter later healed the man who couldn’t walk!! These are big things! Big things that were brought about by people, years earlier, doing the mundane things that God had called them to do.

We never know what God has planned for our kids, our husband or even ourselves. We have no idea how He is going to use the mundane to fulfill His plan for amazing things in the future.  Take heart though sisters, because He IS going to use them!!

So enjoy those moments in the car on the way to drop off and pickup. Enjoy the tummy tickles while changing a diaper. Take time let little hands join you in the soapy dish water after dinner. Embrace the mundane moments of life.

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You only get these moments once and you never know what they are doing in the lives of others!

 

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